Porcelin
by EO4EVER
Summary: The painting's worn pale Your eyes have started fading, Were they ever even really there, Nothing to give with everything you take, The cracks in your smile make it impossible, To decipher something legible, Your porcelain face and a heart of glass ADISON


**This isn't supposed to be anything long. It's just something that I decided to write up after taking a break from this site for a while. I'm probably going to write a longer story one day about this same topic/ idea. **

_~The painting's worn pale, Your eyes have started fading, Were they ever even really there, Nothing to give with everything you take, The cracks in your smile make it impossible, To decipher something legible, Your porcelain face and a heart of glass~ Porcelain, David Cook _

Porcelain

Adam never thought this day would come. The day that his best friend would be buried. She was 10 years younger than him; she wasn't supposed to leave the earth first. But she had. By taking her own life. At the young age of 17.

American Idol winner, Kris Allen walked up to Adam and placed a hand on his shoulder. "Hey,"

Adam didn't say anything, just kept looking down at where Allison's dead body lied.

"Adam, you didn't know. Don't blame yourself," the brunette said.

"But it is, Kris! If I wasn't so involved in myself and my stupid music, maybe she would still be here! Maybe she would have told me what was wrong! I could have helped her! And now she's dead! Because of me!" Adam yelled, shaking Kris' hand off of his shoulder. Adam walked away, leaving the younger man there by himself.

At the time of Allison's death, she was temporarily living with Adam, not being able to stand the stuff that was going on at her house. He was trying to get her to open up, but to Allison, it seemed that he was to busy with his friends, his career, and his love life. If only she knew how much she meant to him. What he would do to still have her here today.

Adam sat down at one of the tables as the tears poured from his eyes. A chair pulled out next to him and his mother sat down.

"Oh honey," Ms. Lambert said, comforting her son.

"Allison's DEAD, mum. She… she KILLED herself. It's all my fault. I couldn't help her," he cried. Ms. Lambert hugged her son and tried to calm him down.

"You didn't know what she was going through, Adam. None of us did. We all could have helped her if she wanted us to. It's no one's fault."

"I loved her, mum,"

"I know, I know."

* * *

Adam finally somewhat pulled himself together and joined the rest of the idols. Everyone was in a glum mood and not saying much to anyone. The only sound that you could hear was the sound of crying all throughout the room.

The 10 idols all walked up to Allison's casket, looking down at the red head laying there.

"She's beautiful," Adam said.

"She's our little sister," replied Kris, wiping tears from his eyes. "I'm gonna miss her so much,"

"We all are," Danny added.

Adam reached down and grabbed her soft, delicate hand. When their skin made contact, he started to cry some more.

"Why Allie? Why'd you have to do this?" Adam cried. He softly kissed her hand before placing in back on top of her.

"C'mon Adam. It's time for the ceremony to start," Kris said.

Allison's mother and father had asked Adam to give a speech at her funeral. He declined at first, but eventually gave in.

"Allison is… was my best friend. But two weeks ago, she took her own life. Depression over powered her, and she took the only escape that she knew. Suicide. I just wish that I was able to help her and maybe… just maybe she would still be here today." He had to stop for a second as he couldn't talk while tears were pouring down his face.

"I really don't know what I'm going to do anymore without her in my life. I've had so many good times with her…" Adam trailed of and continued to talk.

* * *

It was soon time for the final goodbyes. Not something that Adam necessarily wanted to do. Slowly walking up to the casket that Allison was lying in, Adam braced himself for the last time that he would ever see her face.

Taking a deep breath, he took the final step and looked down. Once again grabbing her hand, he said his final goodbyes. "Allie… I love you. So much. I'm really gonna miss you, baby girl," Taking of his chain, Adam placed it in her hand and kissed it one final time.

When everyone was leaving, Allison's mom handed Adam a letter.

"This is for you. Allison left it in a box in her room with some other stuff she left for you. You can get it later this week if you want."

"Thank you Mrs. Iraheta," Adam replied.

The second that he was alone, he carefully opened the letter and saw her handwriting.

_Adam, _

_I'm sorry for everything that you're going through. I just couldn't stand living anymore. _

_Just know that you were everything to me. You're the reason why I stayed alive for as long as I did. You really are everything to me. Just know that. _

_I love you. I don't know if Kris told you yet, but I've had feelings for ever since we met during the auditions in San Francisco. All through Idol, especially during rock week, they got even stronger. Then I found out you were gay. It broke my heart, but I shook it off. _

_Don't blame yourself. Please. That's the last thing that I want for you to do. You didn't do anything wrong. You'll be okay. I promise that. I'm happier where I am now. _

_I'm leaving a box of stuff to you. In there is all the stuff that we did together. Pictures, videos, all sorts of things. There's also a bunch of other stuff in there from before you met me. I want you to have it all. _

_Well… I guess this is goodbye. _

_Love, _

_Allison. _

* * *

FIN.


End file.
